Reflections

I am writing the words to a very touching song. I feel that this song best describes who I am.I have added the song to my music player so everyone can hear it.It is the first song on it.

Reflections

performed by Christina Aguilera

Look at me

You may think you see who I really am

But you'll never know me

Everyday

It 's as if I play a part

Now I see

If I wear a mask

I can fool the world

But I cannot fool my heart

Chorus

Who is that girl I see

Staring straight back at me?

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

I am now in a world where I have to hide my heart

And what I believe in

But somehow I will show the world

What's inside my heart

And be loved for who I am

Chorus

Who is that girl I see

Staring straight back at me?

Why is my reflection someone I don't know?

Must I pretend that I'm someone else for a time?

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

There's a heart that must be free to fly

That burns with a need to know the reason why

Why must we all conceal

What we think

How we feel?

Must there be a secret me

I'm forced to hide?

Chorus

I wont' pretend that I'm someone else for all time

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

My New Church

I had left my old church many, many ,many years ago, but I tried to keep to my beliefs. I knew I needed to find a new church but had lost all faith in churches. I am afraid of people and big crowds, so I knew I was going to have a problem with finding a church. I prayed for God to show me where I needed to be.

On June 18 of this year I had gone to the laundry mat to do laundry. I have been going there for over 6 years. Kevin , my hubby, and I were folding clothes when a very sweet older looking couple came in. They wanted to wash some shirts. The couple came over and sat at the table next to ours and started to watch the t.v. The man started to say things to Kevin and the lady started up a conversation with me. I am usually afraid to talk to new people but she made me feel at ease. I was not afraid.

We had a nice conversation with them while we were there. The man was a Pastor of a small church. they talked with us about the church and told us how they started it and all the work they had done." New Bethel Baptist Church" the Pastor said with a hint of pride in his voice. He made me want to go. They invited us to come one Sunday and before we left they gave us a flier for their church. We walked out and got into the van to leave. I kept the flier tightly clinched in my hand. I didn't want to lose it! I wanted to go! I told Kevin that I wanted to go. He agreed we would go as soon as I was ready too.

July 6, 2008 I finally went.

I was so scared to death.

I could feel the lump in my throat. I could feel the tears start to come to my face. I could feel the fear returning. I had tried to go on 2 different Sundays but the fear was to great. I knew if I didn't go that day then I would never go. I even made Kevin drive down to the church and count how many cars were in the parking lot. When he came back and said only 4, I felt a little better. He then told me that is was time to go. I walked out to the van and got in. I turned to Kevin and said"Well am I going to make it there and into the building?". As Most of my close blogger friends know, yes I did make into the church and have gone every Sunday since. I still have fears of going places and meeting new people but going to church every Sunday has helped. Maybe someday I can beat this and be just like every one else, not afraid.

Here are a couple of pictures so you can see it. I will add one later of the outside as soon as I take one. This is what you see when you walk in after walking up about 10 steps. It is a small church but very nice. The people there make you feel safe and are very friendly.This is Pastor Gregg and his wife. He is a very good preacher and I love to listen to him when he speaks. Mrs. Gregg is just the sweetest person. She likes to give me hugs when I go to leave. What I haven't told her is I like that she does. I find myself waiting to tell her good bye in hopes of getting one.

On July 13,2008 I went to a luncheon at the church. They church has one every month so we can all get together at fer services to eat and talk. When I first heard about it I got really excited, but was nervous. I wanted to cook something but was afraid no one would like what I cooked. I decided I was going to have to put my foot down and stop being afraid all the time.I took a walnut cake and got a lot of compliments on it. My cooking can never match up to the other ladies there but I can try. I will post the walnut cake recipe at a later date for those who would like to try it.It is the easiest cake to make.

On the August 17, 2008 There was a Guest Pastor. Pastor Kenny Alkire came to deliver the sermon. He was very good and I liked listening to him also. His wife came along with him and I enjoyed talking to her. She was a very sweet lady that made me smile every time I spoke to her.
I have not become a member of the church yet but I am considering it. I am enjoying the fellowship and good preaching so the out look is good.

God Bless and Have A Wonderful Weekend ! !

Update On Stacy ! ! !

Hello everyone! I know it has been a while since I have blogged but I am trying to come back. I just wanted to give all Stacy's Blogger friends an Update on how she is doing. Stacy, of My Thoughts, has come through her surgery and is doing great. I am not going to give away how much weight she has lost because I think she would want to tell you all. Just know that she is doing great and is happy. I am traveling to see her this weekend. Thank you to everyone for the prayers that were said for her. I know she greatly appreciates it. God Bless and keep smiling.

Tomorrow I am posting about my new church :-)